By When I said, “My foot is slipping,”
Psalm 94 verses 18-19
your unfailing love, Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me,
your consolation brought me joy.
I thought writing posts for this blog was challenging, but goodness these daily recordings are harder than I thought they would be!
Frankly because I don’t know if anyone is reading my blog, I am quite secure in my ramblings. I consider it my daily journal. For these recorded daily devotionals there is pressure: it is more structured and I feel like I have to deliver something that would make God proud and transform the hearts of anyone who calls. I still have some anonymity because the only folks who know it is me are the friends and family that I’ve told.
Unfortunately, I don’t get any feedback – is this good? bad? how can I improve? This lack of feedback triggers my innermost ruthless critic. I initially walk away after the recording thinking ‘wow I really rocked that’ and then the self doubt kicks in. So I made this post for those who doubt themselves.
The scripture above is as much about trusting God as it is about removing (or at least lessening) self doubt. If God believes in you (and news flash – He does!), how can you not believe in yourself? I know it is easier said than done…but we have to practice. Practice trusting in God. Practice believing in yourself. Practice praying – praying to God to alleviate your fears and doubts.
I recently took a cruise to Eastern Europe. One of the excursions was to the Belogradchik rocks in Bulgaria. The guide said we could wait at the bottom of the fortress or climb to the top. As I looked at the rocky pathway and stairs (and lack of stairs) ascending up, I was filled with self doubt about my ability to get to the top. Was I strong enough? Did I have the stamina? I was afraid that I didn’t.
I said a quick prayer asking for strength and began the slow climb upwards. I made it to the first and second tier. I looked up – just one more ‘stairwell’ to get to the top – either through a rickety staircase or a windy rocky path. With patience and perseverance (and support from God), I reached the top and was rewarded with some spectacular views. More precious to me than the views was the boost in confidence AND the boost in my faith.
Dear Lord,
You are a most powerful and loving God.
Your support is unwavering.
Help me to break through the wall of self doubt that I have, so that I can move confidently forward in a relationship with you.
Amen
